Monday, July 16, 2012

50 Shades of RVP: A Summer of Rumors, Disloyalty and Greed

The star of our story

It takes place every summer. As soon as one season ends, the gossip and speculation begins. It happens at every club, but this year it's been Arsenal and one player in particular getting most of the attention. The Robin van Persie saga has been clogging the sports pages this summer and the football media have been having a field day. If every headline told a true story, Robin van Persie would be under contract to at least six clubs at this time. It's become a soap opera with an ending that is still to be written. Here are just some of the highlights from this summer's hottest story 50 Shades of RVP: A Summer of Rumors, Disloyalty and Greed.

March 10, 2012 - Manchester City strikeagreement for Arsenal's Robin van Persie
This one appeared way back in March in The National based in the United Arab Emirates. Hmmm, what a coincidence. This just happens to be the country where Manchester City's owner, Sheikh Mansour lives and is a member of the ruling family of Abu Dhabi. Wasn't the regular EPL season still going on back in March?
The Sheikh rules his empire
May 22, 2012 - Why the Arsenal vibe is that RvP will stay a Gunner The transfer saga of the summer takes another twist...
Just two weeks after the season ended this headline appeared in the Mirror and made Arsenal fans everywhere very happy...but the winds of false rumors and yellow journalism were on the horizon.
Ivan Gazidis is on the case
How kind of our former captain that jumped ship just one year ago. Good old Cesc's advice; do as I say, not as I do courtesy of The Daily Mail.
Do as I say, not as I do
May 29, 2012 - Dutch ace Van Persie told to stay at Arsenal... by his mum!
The Daily Mail with yet another "exclusive"...this time it's Robin van Persie's mother that has told her son to stay at Arsenal. She is quoted as saying "Arsenal love him and that’s a great incentive to stay. Arsenal are a fantastic club'. This one really added to the soap opera theme as now "the family" were involved. We're all taught to listen to our mother. Will RVP do the same? Then again, did she really say that?
Mom knows best
The Mirror goes from RVP will stay, to RVP will be sold. Confusion and speculation are everywhere. The Twitterverse is rampant with rumors and theories.
Will he stay or will he go Wenger?

June 20, 2012 - Wenger - Van Persiewill stay 
Leave it to Sky Sports to tell the "true story". No need to worry any more Arsenal fans, he's staying. Or is he?

RVP's agent Kees Vos
July 4, 2012 - Update For The Fans
Courtesy of Robin van Persie's own website, this one was Tweeted on the 4th of July and sent football fans in to a frenzy. Social Media was overloaded with RVP being called all sorts of things. Meanwhile fans of Oil Sheikh City Football Club and several others were already planning on having RVP in their starting lineup and deciding which mercenary that they formerly loved should be booted like trash to make room for a shiny new mercenary.

July 4, 2012 - ClubStatement: Robin van Persie
Touche. Arsenal's official website hit back with their own response to van Persie's posting. Rumors continue to swirl as well as conspiracies. Could it have been RVP's agent Kees Vos behind this statement? Was it a ploy to get more money?

July 4, 2012 - City fat cat:Van Persie opens door to £220k-a-week move to the champions
Now the fun and games really took off. Every paper, every sports blog and every broadcast had a different story. Here The Mirror tells us what "they think" is going on.

July 6, 2012 - Juventus could beat Manchester City to signing Arsenal's Robin Van Persie
RVP Italy bound?
The plot thickens once again, this time courtesy of The Telegraph. Italian champions Juventus are now in the hunt for RVP. I haven't seen anyone wanted this badly since George Clooney was named People's Sexiest Man Alive.

July 6, 2012 - Kolo Toure wantsRobin van Persie at Manchester City
This one from the London Evening Standard is priceless. Former Arsenal defender Kolo Toure speaking on behalf of Mercenary City. Funny, considering he barely qualified to receive a Premier League winner's medal due to his suspension for doping and then being used exclusively as a substitute. Yes, life on the bench has been good for Kolo Toure.
Kolo Toure invited RVP to join him on the Mercenary City bench
July 7, 2012 - Now Barca ‘n PSG join RVPchase
RVP to Paris?
Leave it to The Sun to have the real story. Forget Mercenary City, Arsenal and Barcelona and Paris Saint-Germain have joined the feeding frenzy.
RVP to Barcelona?

July 10, 2012 - RVP Gets City AdeOf course it's Spuds taking on another Arsenal reject to add more fuel to the story. So according to The Sun, Mercenary City, which bought Adebayor to Manchester, but now wants to dump him, will sell him to Spuds who will take any damaged goods in order for Mercenary City to steal another Arsenal player that they will eventually grow tired of and sell. Sounds about right.
Unwanted goods, Adebayor from Mercenary City to Spuds
July 11, 2012 - Fergie can drive a Van
Another day, another "scoop" from The Sun. This time it's Alex Ferguston and Manchester United in the hunt for RVP.
Fergie gets in on the action
July 13, 2012 - MANCHESTER CITYSET TO SEND KOLO TOURE TO TURKEYThis one comes from the Express. While it doesn't directly involve RVP, it's pretty funny to see that one week after Kolo Toure was begging van Persie to join him at Mercenary City, they are looking to toss Toure out on the garbage heap.

July 13, 2012 - EXCLUSIVE: Arsenal hopeful captain Van Persie will do'a Rooney' and stay
Is Stan the man with any plan?
Extra, extra....this "exclusive" comes courtesy of the Daily Mail. Just when Arsenal fans had fully vented their fury and gotten used to Arsenal without RVP, this headline hits. It's official now, this entire saga has become a circus.

July 14, 2012 - RvP set forArsenal's pre-season tour - unless a bid is made this week
With RVP returning to Arsenal's training camp this one is coming down to the wire. Arsenal's pre-season trip to Asia begins this weekend and the question still remains whether RVP will be on the plane or least according to The Mirror.

The Daily Star is the UK equivalent of the National Enquirer so keep in mind where this story comes from. According to NOBODY (they don't even have the brains to use the old BS standbys of "a source" or "an insider" RVP was spotted house hunting in Chesire. They go on to say that this signals it has come down to a fight between Mercenary City and Man United for RVP.

Ray Parlour
July 16, 2012 - Exclusive - Parlour: Arsenalcould swap Dzeko for Van Persie
Before finishing this posting I checked Google News for any updates on the never ending RVP story and found this one courtesy of talkSport. Here they take a speculative suggestion from former Gunner Ray Parlour and turn it in to the latest theory on the RVP saga.

Stay tuned folks as the next chapter of 50 Shades of RVP: A Summer of Rumors, Disloyalty and Greed has yet to be written.

Meanwhile, film rights for 50 Shades of RVP: A Summer of Rumors, disloyalty and Greed have been secured. No production date has been sent but the leading roles have been cast. They include

Robin Van Persie                                                Ryan Gosling
Arsene Wenger                                                   Gerard Depardieu
Roberto Mancini                                                 Antonio Banderas
Fergie                                                                  Sean Connery
Kees Vos                                                             James Brolin
Stan Kroenke                                                      Daniel Day Lewis
Ivan Gazidis                                                        Ralph Fiennes
Robin van Persie’s Mother                               Julianne Moore
Cesc Fabregas                                                   Gael Garcia Bernal
Kolo Toure                                                          Mekhi Phifer
Ray Parlour                                                         Ewan McGregor

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